This blog post by Liz Barker originally appeared on ChangedbyChance.com on April 28, 2015. It was reprinted here with the author’s permission.
I volunteer at numerous Living Beyond Breast Cancer events through the year. Spring brings an all-day yoga event called Namaste`Day to Philadelphia. LBBC is an advocate of yoga because of its mind, body, and spirit connective healing philosophy. They appreciate that healing a life threatening illness such as breast cancer needs to be addressed with all of the body’s senses. And so, they had a booth at Namas Day and I volunteered because I love yoga.
Typically, there are at least 2 of us survivors at an LBBC event and it is always nice to meet someone new and to hear their BC story.
Well, this encounter turned out to be extraordinary! (Of course, it should have been no surprise given the spiritual nature of Namas Day.)
So, my fellow volunteer that day is Elizabeth Howanski. As usual, we swap our Breast Cancer stories. As usual, I expect that when I tell my new friend that I am a 24 year, young survivor, she will be wowed by the survivor-ship years. Which I am grateful for every day folks.
However, much to my surprise, Betsy tells me that she is a longer survivor! Although we are both the same age (58), Betsy was diagnosed younger, at age 26. Therefore, she is now a 32 year survivor! Neither of us has a family history of BC. Our name and age similarities don’t end there. Betsy was also diagnosed while she was pregnant, at about 5 months along with same timing – diagnosed in May and due date was early October! We were both given the same trite, horrifying advice by our doctors – “terminate your pregnancy to save your life.” Sadly, our parallels end here.
Betsy followed her doctor’s advice and reluctantly terminated her pregnancy. (Remember, there was no Internet and not much history of BC at young ages or during pregnancy back then. Without question, doctor knew best.) I almost followed that advice but, I was fortunate that a family friend, a doctor himself, (an angel I call him), intervened and saved my baby’s life. Betsy and I wept and hugged as we shared our stories. I felt a bit guilty and humbled, that I was touched by an angel and that Bryan was saved. More importantly though, I felt a kindred spirit with Betsy, not only due to our similar past, but also because of our futures and our philosophies of “living beyond breast cancer.”
Betsy bravely moved on with an enthusiastic and positive spin on life. She adopted 3 wonderful children from Korea who are now 21, 29, and 31. She is a long time professional working at Drexel University’s development office. We both echoed the same sentiments about our lives – that the BC experience was a life lesson. It taught us both some sage advice. That we need to be self-advocates and to educate ourselves when we are faced with serious obstacles in our lives. It’s the 3 R’s that I talk about in my book – Recognize, Research, and then React. Live and learn.
Another day, another journey… Namaste~
Liz Barker is a longtime LBBC volunteer. Learn more about Liz and her personal experience with breast cancer on her blog, ChangedbyChance.com.