The Preparation…

This entry was written by Nickia Walker who was diagnosed with with Stage I breast cancer at a grade of 3:

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7

Just as a trainer prepares his fighter for his opponent, God has prepared me for the fight of my life. When you don’t take time out for God you miss out on what he needs you to know, or do. I recall the morning when the Lord spoke to my heart whispering into my spirit, “Nickia, be in preparation for greatness, but in the mist you must carry the cross.” I remember becoming uneasy about what that could mean. Excited about what greatness could be, but not willing, so-to-speak, to take on the heaviness of that cross. I cried out, “Lord why?” I couldn’t deny what I was feeling for He already knows my heart. Then the still voice said, “I never said I sent YOU to the front line.” Whoa! That spoke to me, awakening that dead thing within me preparing me for whatever was ahead.

“I’m nothing without Christ, just dust, but with Him I’m more than a conqueror, I’m victorious, and I’m prepared!”

Later that night the excitement was still fresh & alive! I told my children what we need to do, but explaining to them carrying the cross could mean anything, and the attack we may face we shall not fear. Not long after that I felt the lump in my breast and soon received that phone call which I will never forget. I was at work when I received the call and had about 7 hours left. God had already prepared my heart & mind which prepared me to finish out my day, caring for those who weren’t able to care for themselves with a smile on my face, and gentleness in my touch. I quietly told God “well, here we go, and we got work to do”. My part is easier than I thought, I just have to follow. I’m just needed to play the back-round. He’s a thousand steps ahead of me, He’s already cleared the way. God made it clear to me that He doesn’t need ME on home-front. All He asks is that we: read the Word, stay on our knees, thank Him through it, and stand on His promises.

On those not-so-good days, you and I may find ourselves balled up in the corner of our bedroom. But God whispers “keep your head up, you’re almost there, you can do it, just trust Me, I’ll never leave you, nor forsake you”. As the trainee watches the tapes of his opponent studying his every move, God has shown me that my competition has already been defeated.

However, there’s rules to this battle. I must never lose sight of what’s in front of me. I must never feel as if I am strong enough to stand alone, because my strength comes from the bread of life. I don’t have to worry about getting weak, because God said his grace is made sufficient for me, his power is made perfect in my weakness.

The bell rang! They said what’s about to hit me can take me out for the count. Then God said, but I said No Weapon Formed Against You Shall Prosper. But Lord I heard his people in the corner talking smack, telling me I better brace myself because I may lose some things that I hold dear. Then God said, I will bless your latter end more than your beginning. God restores all! Finally, it is my duty to tell the people of God’s goodness even before my storm is over, that’s the kind of faith I have, and this is what he expects of us all. I’m able to breathe when I steal away time with the Lord. I can function, I can write in this blog, I’m nothing without Christ, just dust, but with Him I’m more than a conqueror, I’m victorious, and I’m prepared!

Be sure to check out Nickia’s blog!

13 thoughts on “The Preparation…

  1. AMEN Nickia! Your blog touched me from the moment I read that scripture. I lost my Mom to cancer, and it was her favorite! Funny…I was speaking to a friend last week, about whether or not my Mom has been with me in spirit, through my journey-And, I must shout with a resounding,”Yes”! Since that conversation, I have received/been sent that scripture twice, including your blog. You are right-this journey is not about us-it’s about God! And, He is using this experience for our good. To the benefit of those who will come behind. Since my diagnosis, two very good friends were diagnosed with breast cancer-and they had me, tangible evidence, that you can overcome breast cancer…And, that THERE IS life beyond it! During my journey, I have CONSTANTLY read the Book of Job. I’ve learned, as Job did that through his/my challenges-if you remain faithful, God will RESTORE all that you lost. But, truly this journey has provided with me with nothing but gain. The new friends, and “amazing”experiences I’ve had were due to being diagnosed with this disease. You are right…Be still and know that HE IS GOD! Whenever I was “fearful”( I’m still human!) This verse from Isaiah 42:10, ALWAYS soothed my spirit-“Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you. I will uphold you with MY righteous right hand.” My you, and your family continue to be blessed. I always remembered whenever I was sick, and lying in bed…If God created Heaven & Earth…then breast cancer is NO match for his healing powers! I will keep you in my prayers…

  2. Thank you so much for all your prayers, and now Tonya you are one more added to my prayer list as well…God is so Awesome! It’s amazing how he draws people together in the midst of certain circumstances, but nevertheless our steps are ordered! I wouldn’t want it any other way..Stay Encouraged my Sista!

  3. Nickia, yes God was with me through my breast cancer journey. I believed my faith, but not without some questioning. The “why me” questions started. My brothers and sisters from my church were all there to support me as well as my family and my team of doctors. It was a tough time for me, but I was a very lucky girl. I remember my phone call too. I was on my way to a girl scout meeting where I am a co-leader. I didn’t even know how I was going to make it through the night. I was just so upset but tried to hide it from the girls. The next few months were filled with worry as I was trying to decide what I had to do. I underwent a lumpectomy and was told that I would require radiation but no chemotherapy because my tumor had not spread. For weeks I went back to the surgeon and was told that things were fine until the day came where I was diagnosed with the BRCA2 gene. My game changed from there. There were a lot of questions again and again there were no clear cut answers for me. I said absolutely no to a mastectomy until I realized that I had been advised that I had an 85% chance of the tumor returning over my lifetime. Then I found a ray of light and decided what I had to do to protect myself. I underwent a total hysterectomy and two weeks later I underwent a bilateral mastectomy with immediate reconstruction. Three years out now and I am cancer free and doing well. I am happy again and don’t seem to worry that much about it. I am proactive with my health and keep up with my screenings. You see, I think the early detection of my breast cancer saved my life. This breast cancer thing was a double edged sword because I learned a few quite things about myself… I am a strong woman, I am a fighter and that I would eventually come around and be able to help others. Yes, through the Grace of God I have received many blessings including having my good health returned to me. I am so thankful too that I have included GOD in my life.

    • You and I share the same exact story the only difference my genetic testing showed a mutation of BRCA1. I wrote a blog entitled “Wrong Diagnosis” check it out when you can….3 years out for you has given me more hope!!! I have a ways to go but I’m excited about the expected end!!!

      • I’m so late responding because I never knew I even had responses, I just happen to be on facebook today and stumbled upon it, lol! Imagine that:)

      • Please don’t give up hope. It is great to remain positive and hopeful. I found that keeping my attitude in check helped me feel better. I have to tell you in the beginning I was so afraid of the outcome. I have learned to calm down a lot and because I had the mastectomy and am on the Arimidex I understand that my risk factor has been reduced from about 85% to under 5 percent but closer to 1 or 2%. I will check out your blog, but for me I never considered my BRCA status a wrong diagnosis just one that they came up with after they obtained more information. So lucky for me that they did find out because I based a lot of my decisions on this BRCA testing. Good luck and keep in contact if you need to talk.

  4. I want to thank you Nickia for your awesome testimony. I believe that the Lord was (and still is) with me thru my battle and test. When I was told of my diagnosis, I was devasted. I immediately started praying. My family, friends and strangers all prayed for me. My faith was tested. I never questioned why, because I knew that the doctors simply couldn’t give me an answer. My friend from Virginia told me that God some times make you go thru some things. I had no idea He meant invasive breast cancer. I felt like the Lord was not listening to me, when I should have been listening to Him. The day that I found out that my cancer had not spread, I knew that God and I were on the same page. Four days before my surgery, I attended a gospel explosion. The headline singer was Marvin Sapp. That concert was so inspiring. I did not think that Marvin Sapp would perform since his wife had just died of colon cancer. My oldest daughter was singing in the choir as background for Marvin Sapp. When Mr. Sapp started singing “Never Would Have Made It”, it was like God was speaking to me. He said that if this man could sing for me eventhough his wife is in heaven with me, you should trust that I will be with you thru this journey. God is good all the time. I started my chemo treatments Dec. 22nd, 2010, and I finished Feb.23, 2011. I know that I would not be here if the Lord didn’t smile on me. I am still finding out what He wants me to do, but I am working toward His glory. My mother is going thru chemo treatments for lung cancer and I am helping her to make it thru her journey. I know that He was with me all the way and I know He will be with her too. My favorite saying is “God has smiled on me”. I am no longer ashamed, or afraid and I think we all should share the Lord’s blessings with others. God bless you and continue to prosper.

    • What an awesome story…It’s so good to know God is faithful in his doing, he said he will never leave us nor forsake us….God bless you and I pray for your prosperity as well…

  5. I think in the end, we all pray for the same things,,,,hope for us, to become survivors and for a cure to this really crappy disease. Let’s all keep praying ladies!!!

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