A Daughter’s Breast Cancer Journey: Through Her Mother’s Eyes: Part 2 of 3

This entry was written by Nancy Amorosi. Many of you may remember Jaime Rossano, one of the year-long series bloggers who, in a raw and honest tone, shared her breast cancer journey from diagnosis to post treatment in 2011. In this entry, her mother gives us her perspective of the journey. Over the year, she tried desperately to hide her true feelings of fear that consumed her heart facing the reality that she could never handle the idea of losing her baby girl.

Every Tuesday for the rest of this month, join Nancy as she recaps her daughter’s breast cancer diagnosis in a 3-week series.

Read Jaime’s blogs by searching “Jaime Rossano” in the search box on this site.

This year Jaime is getting adjusted to not having a blog deadline, having completed her year-long series in December of 2011. But the start of the 2011 New Year introduced us to chemotherapy and the words of one kind nurse that did not come true – “Oh Jaime, you are so young this will be a piece of cake”. So the infusions began. Within hours the color would drain from her face, the nausea would creep in and by evening and the days to follow she was sick, suffering headaches, bone pain, body aches, nausea and worst of all she lost her smile. My heart was in so much pain. I felt so incredibly helpless and could not bear to see our little girl suffer so much. I gave her a small red heart locket with little Ronnie’s picture inside. And when the light began to fade from her eyes I would whisper to her to look into her baby boy’s eyes and draw strength and courage to fight. I admit there were days for me too when darkness overshadowed the light and I would hold my grandson and almost magically felt a new sense of hope. Sure enough with each passing day the symptoms would fade and her smile would re-emerge giving us all a renewed sense of hope. Only to repeat this cycle again and again and again and again and again and again.

Within weeks of starting chemo the hair clippers buzzed and her locks fell to the floor. She could not bear to watch her hair fall out strand by strand so she took control and beat the monster called “cancer” to the punch. She wore a beautiful colorful bandana each and every day. We spent chemo days side by side and the five or six “sick” days to follow were filled with emotion, sadness, fear, laughter, anger, frustration, and emotional exhaustion. Our lives had developed a new “routine”. Seems silly but we actually got good at the routine of chemo week. But, they were also the most difficult, emotional and exhausting for both of us in very different ways. Somehow we found humor among the chaos. Days led to weeks and weeks led to months and before long chemo was done. The amazing strength, courage and determination in our daughter’s eyes week after week continued to give me hope.

Radiation therapy followed week after week and despite feeling tired and weak her resilience prevailed. She maintained her motto; be strong, be fierce, be ME! As time passed positive changes emerged. The importance of love, life and family took hold. No longer sweating the small stuff, living each day and not allowing the “what if” of tomorrow to ruin today became a new way of life.

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14 Responses to “A Daughter’s Breast Cancer Journey: Through Her Mother’s Eyes: Part 2 of 3”

  1. Diane Says:

    You don’t realize how much we try to put those days out of our mind…….Cancer is a word…not a sentence. Your daughter is BEAUTIFUL & STRONG!! She will make it through! Thank you for sharing your side Nancy (((HUGS)))

  2. Anonymous Says:

    Reading this blog brought tears to my eyes as I felt you put words to everything i felt last year as I endured month after month of chemo. In 2010 I had a similar experience as jamie as I conquered 6 months of agressive chemotherapy where every complication imaginable happened. I was 28 with two boys…3yrs and 3 months old. My marriage was on the rocks and my world was falling to pieces. I persevered through with the same motto…it is what it is…be strong be fierce!! Almost 2 years later my life is redefined any my priorites realigned. My marriage is better than ever my boys are healthy and my career is taking off!! So to Jamie be strong be fierce!!! Thanks for sharing your story and touching me so :)

    • Anonymous Says:

      I am so happy for you! Reading your post brought tears to my eyes as I know how incredibly difficult it must have been for you. You have taken that experience and journey and used it in a positive light. Bless you and your family. Continue to be strong, be fierce, be YOU!!

  3. Anonymous Says:

    Nancy
    So beautiful; I am moved to tears. Jaime is so strong and fierce because you are strong and fierce. You were so strong for your daughter and that is such a blessing. Thank you for sharing your intimate details of those painful days with us. It must have been so hard for you as a mother to endure. Thank God Jaime is doing well and getting stronger.
    Lisa Marsella

  4. Rhana Pytell Says:

    Thank you for sharing your wisdom, love for your Jaime and this gem:

    “No longer sweating the small stuff, living each day and not allowing the “what if” of tomorrow to ruin today became a new way of life.”
    Beautiful!

  5. Anonymous Says:

    Dear Nancy
    It is a long bad journey.. but there will be a light at the end of the tunnel.This storm will pass over…
    it will not be easy…but you are so strong..and Jaime is so strong.
    Thank you for sharing your feelings and please
    keep smiling and keep shining…
    ”cause laugh is the best medicine..
    Lots of kisses and hugs

    love walter & hanny/holland

  6. pinkforapurpose Says:

    We are all fighting together. Your routine was also my routine, but I have thanked God since the beginning for my healing, so now I thank him for hers!

  7. Yvonne Vallier Says:

    My daughter is having surgery Fri, 4/27/2012. She will have both breast removed. She is 41 and has two children at home and one grown son and one grandson. We will walk this walk and fight this fight together. I have placed her in God’s hands and I know He will be with us every step of the way. God bless and keep my precious daughter in your prayers.

  8. Emily Says:

    What do you do when your daughter wants to keep you at arms length and on a need to know basis

  9. Anonymous Says:

    I thought i had a double masectomy in 2001 – i recently found out in 2013 after having a biopsy of 1 breast and i changed from Hahnemann Hospital to Thomas jefferson Hospital that i never has a masectomy in 2001 (i was cut but no masectomy was done – i still have my lymph nodes & mammary glands) – i am now undergoing chemo treatments & my cancer is curable – but i will still need the masectomy on both breasts – keep your thoughts positive & know that we are all sisters walking the same path – you are in my prayers

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